My neighbours are such show-offs. It’s like the admiration of those less fortunate is their lifeblood. Just last week, they had their fence repainted. Now, they are getting a stunning glass fenced pool installed, Melbourne has never before seen such a family of show-offs.
Now, you may be wondering how I know this. After all, it is not like I can see into their backyard. Here is the kicker: it is in the front yard. Who gets a pool installed in their front yard? Only my neighbours, because they are desperate for everyone else to be jealous of them.
I, for one, am not jealous. Only a little. Okay, I am jealous this time. I wish I could get a lovely blue pool with a classy glass fence around it. I was not jealous of anything else they had done until now. Not the fence, not the garish statue in their front yard, and not even the sportscar sitting in their driveway. Funny how everything seems to be on the outside. The inside is probably a complete dump. I’d like to think so, anyway.
I may not live in a place that can accommodate a pool, but I do like to think about my dream house. I’d live in a huge mansion, with a kidney shaped pool enclosed by a sleek frameless pool fence, in Melbourne of course. I would have a walk-in wardrobe, with plenty of space for the designer clothes I would own. I would have huge entertainment spaces, as family comes first. I want these things not to show off, but because they would bring me joy. Other than the wardrobe- I have to have one indulgence, after all- every aspect of my dream house is centred on how I would use it. I would invite friends and family to the pool, and it would be in the backyard too, so nobody is conscious of jealous neighbours looking in. A pool is completely wasted on my shallow neighbours.